BY JOAN KIM

In print | April 17, 2008

Displaying their talent, charisma and an impressive set of guns, 12 contestants strutted their stuff down the catwalk for the Mr. Swarthmore competition last Friday in Upper Tarble. Based on their performance in six events, three judges determined who would gain the title of Mr. Swarthmore. Sponsored by the Ladies’ Soiree Society, the show fundraised almost $800 for the Women’s Community Revitalization Project based in Philadelphia, which supports social and economic justice for low-income women and their families.

LaSS co-founder Claire Melin ’08 came up with the idea of Mr. Swarthmore last winter as part of her mission to increase school spirit at Swarthmore. Last year, the event raised money for the American Cancer Society, but this year the group decided on the WCRP because “it resonated with us on a personal level. It hit closer to home,” Melin said.

Alcohol Education and Intervention Specialist Tom Elverson and Registrar Martin Warner were joined by Kohlberg Coffee Bar Barista Katie Corbett to take on the daunting task of selecting Mr. Swarthmore 2008.

During the formal wear competition, each contestant was introduced dressed in what each deemed to be appropriate formal attire. Shirts were shed pretty quickly even at the start of the competition, starting from when Mr. TOPSoccer, Dan Abdul-Malak ’09, strutted out shirtless with a bow-tie complementing his finely toned body. Mr. SBC, Fletcher Coleman ’09, fittingly came out in clothing covered with fake money as Melin announced his interests, including “taking his SBC funded Porsche out cruising around town while lighting Cuban cigars with $100 bills.” Mr. Massage, Jaymes Fairfax-Columbo ’10, attempted to capture points by lassoing the judges while Mr. Soccer, Gage Newman ’11, looked stunning in a little black dress. Mr. Swimming, Tramane Hall ’11, added personal style with a pair of shades.

The bathing suit and tropical wear was a chance for the contestants to show off their creativity. Coleman, after several failed attempts at ripping off his shirt, paid audience member Dogus Cubuk ‘10 to do it for him. Other noteworthy moments were when Mr. Cross-Country, Andrew VanBuren ’10, came out with a snorkel and swimming fins, Mr. SAC, Shumpei Tse ’10, wore a hot white suit, Mr. Psi Phi, Daniel Jamison ’08, donned a pirate’s costume complete with hat and Mr. Delta Upsilon, Alex Ginsberg ’08, came out in a sparkly, eye-catching thong.

Not only were these contestants eye candy, they also proved they had stage presence in the talent portion. Abdul-Malak performed a version of “Business Time” by Flight of the Concords tweaked to reflect Swat life. “Girl, tonight we’re gonna make love … Tuesday night’s the night when you have Astro Lab but Wednesday night is the night we make love,” he crooned. Fairfax-Columbo showed his ability to stamp due-date cards and prepare library books despite distractions such as a pie to the face.

Several contestants chose to sing and dance their way into judges’ hearts. Mr. RnM, G Patrick ‘10, and Mr. Engineer, Seth Hara ’08, combined forces in a song and dance routine that reached new heights when they took out their glow sticks. Tse donned a wig to recreate Britney Spears’ VMA Awards performance with all the awkwardness but sadly, more impressive dance moves than the original performance. Jamison prefaced his act by saying “people love two things more than anything else: bread and circuses. I’m out of bread, people. Would you like to see a spectacle?” Jamison then proceeded to act out entering into the pit of a red dragon with a small house cat on its shoulder. Mr. Basketball, Danny Walker ’10, drew a portrait of a LaSS member in three minutes.

The media portion of the competition was a crowd favorite, as many contestants had witty taglines including Ginsberg’s “Why DU? For one thing, you can’t spell education without DU … or drunk.”

After this portion, the final five contestants were announced. Tse, Patrick, Hall, Newman and Hara moved on to the Q&A session. Each answered two questions from the judges. These stumpers included, “If your life were a movie what would be one song from your soundtrack?” and “Do you see yourself as a giver or a taker?” (To which Hall replied, “I’m versatile.”)

The competition ended with a clothed Dash for Cash, with contestants raising nearly $800. After a brief interim as results were tallied, Patrick was declared as first runner-up and Hara as the new Mr. Swarthmore.

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